And So It Begins--Part 1
Tomorrow is the day I begin my month of smoking cessation classes. I'm sort of nervous. Not because I haven't been to the classes before; this will be my third attempt at smoking cessation classes. Nor is it because I haven't tried to stop smoking before because I've tried to quit more times than I can count. I've even been successful for as long as 6 months. But something always happens that lures me back into that cycle.
I am not even sure why I started smoking in the first place. I never had a cigarette until I was twenty-four years old. One day, when out with friends, I picked one up and smoked; I've been smoking ever since. At first I used to try to delude myself by saying things like "well I've only smoked for 6 years, I will quit soon." Ya, well I said that for years and years only to realize now that I have been smoking for nearly 20 years! And, if I am going to be truly honest, I love smoking--I really do enjoy it. I do hate the smoke smell, but much of that smell is alleviated because I smoke only outside or in the garage (I've been banned from the house). Giving up something I enjoy is going to be hard. Smoking isn't like alcohol or illegal drugs in the sense that the user doesn't hit rock bottom and realize they HAVE to give it up for there own good. I know that I have to give up the habit for the good of my health, but my smoking doesn't put me in risk of arrest and imprisonment; I need my rock bottom!!
But, because I want to be around to see my grandson graduate from college and marry some day, I HAVE to quit. Because I am tired of hiding around corners of the house so my grandson won't look out the window and see his Gammy with a nasty cigarette hanging out of her mouth, I need to quit smoking. because I want to set a good explain for my grandson, I need to quit.
It will be hard! I tend to smoke most during specific tasks--like talking on the phone or when I am drinking coffee, or right after a meal. I spend a lot of my day outside or in the garage because that is where I smoke. I tend to be a "reward smoker." After completing a task from my "to do" list, I reward myself with a cigarette. Sweep the floor--have a smoke; load of laundry--have a smoke; pay a bill--have a smoke; you get the idea! need to replace that reward with a different reward. I haven't decided what yet; the new reward cannot include food of any kind. Weight gain has always been my downfall when it comes to quitting. I eat constantly, gain weight, and start smoking again.
Wow, Part 1 was long! Guess what I get to do now? HAVE A SMOKE! I seriously need a different reinforcer!
I am not even sure why I started smoking in the first place. I never had a cigarette until I was twenty-four years old. One day, when out with friends, I picked one up and smoked; I've been smoking ever since. At first I used to try to delude myself by saying things like "well I've only smoked for 6 years, I will quit soon." Ya, well I said that for years and years only to realize now that I have been smoking for nearly 20 years! And, if I am going to be truly honest, I love smoking--I really do enjoy it. I do hate the smoke smell, but much of that smell is alleviated because I smoke only outside or in the garage (I've been banned from the house). Giving up something I enjoy is going to be hard. Smoking isn't like alcohol or illegal drugs in the sense that the user doesn't hit rock bottom and realize they HAVE to give it up for there own good. I know that I have to give up the habit for the good of my health, but my smoking doesn't put me in risk of arrest and imprisonment; I need my rock bottom!!
But, because I want to be around to see my grandson graduate from college and marry some day, I HAVE to quit. Because I am tired of hiding around corners of the house so my grandson won't look out the window and see his Gammy with a nasty cigarette hanging out of her mouth, I need to quit smoking. because I want to set a good explain for my grandson, I need to quit.
It will be hard! I tend to smoke most during specific tasks--like talking on the phone or when I am drinking coffee, or right after a meal. I spend a lot of my day outside or in the garage because that is where I smoke. I tend to be a "reward smoker." After completing a task from my "to do" list, I reward myself with a cigarette. Sweep the floor--have a smoke; load of laundry--have a smoke; pay a bill--have a smoke; you get the idea! need to replace that reward with a different reward. I haven't decided what yet; the new reward cannot include food of any kind. Weight gain has always been my downfall when it comes to quitting. I eat constantly, gain weight, and start smoking again.
Wow, Part 1 was long! Guess what I get to do now? HAVE A SMOKE! I seriously need a different reinforcer!
posted by Dianna | 9:20 AM
3 Comments:
GOOD LUCK my friend! You are very strong, I know you can do this! Okay so I have been watching all the seasons to Sex and the city this past week and I have to say, I have probably smoked a cig daily maybe two years of my life and I have'nt had one in almost 5 years, but this show makes me want one sooooo bad Carrie (SJP) is always smoking lol.
Anyways I wanted to wish you luck and I missed you in chat tonight
:( I came on to late tonight.
You can do it Di! I missed you in chat too - dance stuff - and I always look forward to talking to you - you are like the voice of reason.
You are a strong woman and I know that you will do great :) Make sure you do it for YOU though - because it's not enough to quite for finnie or marcus or lindsay or shannon or anyone else...
Your reward will be better health - and maybe you can use the money you save for new sb stuff :)
Thanks Ladies. I really appreciate the vote of confidence that I can kick this habit!
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