Fourteen Years and Counting
Today Marcus and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary. That probably doesn't seem like a lot to some people but it is for me. I never imagined that I would find someone like him to share my life with. Yes, I know that sometimes I gripe about him and I am not always happy with him; nor is he always happy with me. And, of course, we have had our ups and downs together, but if I had to marry him all over again I would without a moment's hesitation.
I met Marcus during a time that I had completely sworn off men. I was just a year out of my second abusive marriage and was really working hard to overcome the issues in myself that prompted me to choose men who would treat me bad. I had no intentions of ever marrying again; I figured that my judgment had been so poor in the past that I had better not take any more chances. However, against my better judgment, I accepted his request for a date. I guess I thought that dating was safe as long as I didn't allow myself to fall in love. And our "dating" was safe in light of the fact that for the first month of dating Marcus insisted that my children come along on every date. Thinking back now I realize that that probably wasn't a smart thing on my part--allowing my children to become attached to someone I had no intentions of ever marrying or even having a long term relationship with. But he grew on me. He was so respectful, kind, and honest that it was hard not to like him.
I remember the night that I finally shared my past with him and told him that I didn't ever intend to remarry; he told me that he wasn't sure why but that my telling him that I never intended to remarry hurt his feelings.
Despite my revelations to him, he stuck around and it didn't take long for him to become my best friend. We shared everything with each other and finally, much to my chagrin, he won my heart. Though I really think he wormed his way into my heart through my children--they loved him and he loved them. How could I possibly not fall in love with this man? How could I even imagine living without him in my life? I couldn't, so I did what I swore I would never do--I married him! Thank God I did. If I died today I would do so knowing that I was loved, respected, and cared about.
Living with me is not always easy; I came to our marriage with a lot of baggage and many emotional scars. Marcus was so patient and so willing to accept and wait out the after affects of other men's abuse; he really must be a saint! His love makes me a better person; it reminds me everyday of the person I can be, of the person I want to be, of the person I am. Right along beside me, he has raised my daughters as though they were his; never once claiming them as step-children--they are HIS children. They are better people today because of his presence in their lives. There really are no words to convey how much I love this man -- I love his intelligence, his humor, his integrity, and even his ability to make me laugh when I am so mad at him that I just want to spit. I hope and I pray that I have another fourteen years and more with him.
I met Marcus during a time that I had completely sworn off men. I was just a year out of my second abusive marriage and was really working hard to overcome the issues in myself that prompted me to choose men who would treat me bad. I had no intentions of ever marrying again; I figured that my judgment had been so poor in the past that I had better not take any more chances. However, against my better judgment, I accepted his request for a date. I guess I thought that dating was safe as long as I didn't allow myself to fall in love. And our "dating" was safe in light of the fact that for the first month of dating Marcus insisted that my children come along on every date. Thinking back now I realize that that probably wasn't a smart thing on my part--allowing my children to become attached to someone I had no intentions of ever marrying or even having a long term relationship with. But he grew on me. He was so respectful, kind, and honest that it was hard not to like him.
I remember the night that I finally shared my past with him and told him that I didn't ever intend to remarry; he told me that he wasn't sure why but that my telling him that I never intended to remarry hurt his feelings.
Despite my revelations to him, he stuck around and it didn't take long for him to become my best friend. We shared everything with each other and finally, much to my chagrin, he won my heart. Though I really think he wormed his way into my heart through my children--they loved him and he loved them. How could I possibly not fall in love with this man? How could I even imagine living without him in my life? I couldn't, so I did what I swore I would never do--I married him! Thank God I did. If I died today I would do so knowing that I was loved, respected, and cared about.
Living with me is not always easy; I came to our marriage with a lot of baggage and many emotional scars. Marcus was so patient and so willing to accept and wait out the after affects of other men's abuse; he really must be a saint! His love makes me a better person; it reminds me everyday of the person I can be, of the person I want to be, of the person I am. Right along beside me, he has raised my daughters as though they were his; never once claiming them as step-children--they are HIS children. They are better people today because of his presence in their lives. There really are no words to convey how much I love this man -- I love his intelligence, his humor, his integrity, and even his ability to make me laugh when I am so mad at him that I just want to spit. I hope and I pray that I have another fourteen years and more with him.
posted by Dianna | 12:01 AM
2 Comments:
Dianna, your eloquent tribute to Marcus brought tears to my eyes. Happy Anniversary to you and Marcus!
Happy belated anniversary. Have I mentioned that I really like Marcus lately? How wonderful that the two of you found each other!
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